I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
