he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
i think i just lost a toe
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
