I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
