NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
