a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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