): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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