I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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