yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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