yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
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Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
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just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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