6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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