considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize