you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
worst night to have a conscience
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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