OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
