booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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