youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
