So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You ruined the universe
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
