but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
