its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Still dying that you shit outside
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
