You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
