woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
