I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
