when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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