Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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