I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Randomize
