I wish i was in the wii world.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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