omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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