Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
