I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize