There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
