Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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