Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
