Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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