Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
