Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
