yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
