Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
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