Yo dont text me then not text me
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Oh god it's open bar.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
