Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Two words: blizzard sex
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
