she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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