Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
