kristin has been a bad kristin
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
nutella sex= disaster
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
