belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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