yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
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I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
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I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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