I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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