I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
