Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
