K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize