Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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