I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize