week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I just gift wrapped bread.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
