He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
You were trust falling into bushes
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
